June 15, 2004 12:00 PM
5. And God Said: ‘Let There Be a 4th Option!’

Here's the plan. You don't have to follow along, but what's it going to hurt?

You can't vote for George Bush. A vote for Bush is a vote for misguided nationalism, which is almost the same as pure evil.

You can't vote for John Kerry. A vote for Kerry is a vote for a man who doesn't stand for anything, and if he does, he sure as hell ain't sharing with the public what those things may be.

You can't vote for Ralph Nader. If you don't know the answer to that, you probably shouldn't bother reading the rest of this post....

You shouldn't decide not to vote. Unless it's a political stance in and of itself, not voting is just lazy and, well, I won't say unpatriotic, but it sure as hell isn't very enlightened. So, who can you vote for? Let's break it down, shall we?

I live in Texas. Thus, Bush will win this state as well as our 19 (I believe) Electoral College votes. If you don’t live in Texas, do some research and count how many Electoral votes your state hands over to the winner; if you’re in a swing state, weigh your options (don’t be foolhardy). If you’re not in a swing state, then, please hear me out. Unless you really want Dubya to win, don't vote for him, he's got the bag already. And don't vote for Kerry, as we learned in the last election, the popular vote doesn't make the slightest difference. And Nader.... that's just silly, damn it.

Yet, there is a 4th option my fine liberally conservative and conservatively liberal friends. The write-in vote. It's simple, and it's always there. You hear about it every 4 years, at least one asshole in the country votes for Mickey Mouse. As useless as that is, at least it makes more sense than a vote for Nader (or worse, Perot). Still, a Mickey Mouse vote is, by definition, a mickey mouse vote... don't waste the country's time. Rather, write down the name of the man or woman you truly want to see running the White House and leading the United States of America.

Here, I suggest to you that we all write-in a vote for Senator John McCain. You may not agree with all of his politics (I sure as hell don't, I mean, just stop the condemning of Hollywood for the social violence in America, that's just incomplete thinking). However, he is, at this point in time, the best man for the job. Not only is he a veteran (which should've gotten him farther than it did in 2000), but he's also a man who is in touch with the people... especially those of us in the younger generations (X and Y). Don't vote for the man just because he goes on the Daily Show, vote for the man because he goes on the Daily Show to address the issues he thinks is important, the issues he wants US to know about... and more often than not, they are important. The man stands by his convictions harder than any other politician I've ever seen or studied (outside of Lincoln or Roosevelt). And this means you can trust the man.

You may not like everything he'll do, but the chance that he'll lie to you is so far below the radar, it's sad that the two big party candidates don't even come close. You can't trust Bush, as experience has proven. You can't trust Kerry, not because he's wishy-washy (we all have the right to change our mind), but because he simply won't tell us anything other than "Bush is evil, we must get him out of office."

So, you may not agree with me on John McCain. To that I say: Don't. Vote. For. Him. It's fairly easy. Write someone else’s name down. Vote for one of the other three. I may think those candidates are poor excuses for presidential nominees, but if you don't, by all means, vote for one of them.

Yet, if you are like me, please, I beg you, don't waste your vote. Vote your heart. And my heart tells me "John McCain."

So, I'm announcing it here and now... I'm starting a write-in campaign (oh, it'll be small, so microscopic it'll barely make a dent) for Senator McCain. I ask that you do the same. Two people are already behind me, don't leave yourselves out, kids.

-Rob

Let me know what you think, I'm very interested to hear.

Posted at 12:00 PM | Comments? (422)